My photoswap photos from our holiday

I've been really unorganised with the photoswap this year and a lot of people taking part have also been really busy, so its been coming along slowly... I don't really mind to much, as its not an urgent project and its the sharing of photos process that I enjoy the best rather than the speed of it.

I used my holga camera, as I haven't used it for a while and I sent my film to Dianna to get developed and I'm really thrilled with the results, I love how soft they look.

I'm also really thrilled that the photo of the goats head around its shed worked out, it was only there for a minute and I thought I'd missed it.

These photos are also making me excited about our holidays this year, hurray!

Camera: Holga 135bc
Film: Lomography CN400
Location: Whitby, Yorkshire

Why I love this photo

I've been wondering what to post today - some days I just have nothing to share, and I rarely schedules posts very far ahead, but then Twitter saved me (hurray). Adam Bronkhorst tweeted a link to a post that described why he loved one photo so much and I absolutely loved reading it. I've been trying not to get too sappy whilst I've been writing my Ecourse (I know I keep mentioning it, I'm sorry, its pretty much all I think about in my spare time right now...) but I've come to realise that taking photos for me is an emotional process, and Dawn even described my photos as 'emotive' yesterday in her LC-A test roll post (which you should read...) so this post is really a progression from that and something that I wanted to share with everyone who reads this.

So here we are, photo number one in my new '"Why I love this photo" series.

I tried to start this off with a photo from my first rolls of film in 2009, but looking back at these photos, I realised that even though I loved the process of using a film camera again, it wasn't until I was in Wales, in September 2009, using my 7th roll of film with my Holga 135bc, that I fell back in love with photography but also in love with light.

That probably sounds a little odd, but its true. And this photo reminds of how I felt on that beach, on our first night in Wales. Of how beautiful the beach looked, of how the light bounced off the thin layer of water and hazily reflected across the sand. Of how relaxed I felt, just soaking that beautiful golden light in and how happy I was to just be taking photos, walking along the beach with some of my favourite people in the world...

It took me 7 rolls of film to begin to understand that a wonderful photo isn't just about composition or the camera or the film, but its the light, its looking for that perfect light that expresses exactly how you feel in that moment. Even now, nearly 4 years later, I'm still learning how I want to take photos and how to look for that moment of light that expresses me so well, and honestly, I don't think I've even fully realised these things yet... I may never fully realise them.

This photo however, marks the unrealised beginning of that journey for me - none of the photos I had taken before, although I love them for being a part of my journey, have sung to me, have made me gasp, or look at my photos in wonder. None of the photos before this made me think 'I've found it...' that missing whatever it is that I'm looking for.

I think the best thing now, looking back at this photo, is knowing that I had no clue about what was ahead of me... about where I would go with my photography, the photos I would take, how much it would really mean to me later. Though I guess really, I could say the same thing about any of my photos. But this photo especially, means that much to me now because without even realising it, it was that first photo that really made my heart sing, not just in taking it, but looking at it afterwards as well.

Our Christmas tree...

These photos are actually from last year but our tree always looks pretty much the same if I'm honest (you can see photos from last year here) I'm a stickler for tradition at Christmas. Although we do have my parents fancy, flashy LED lights on the tree after I accidentally stole them earlier this year. (Thanks Dad and Mum, oops).

I took these last year with my Holga 135bc as I knew I needed to finish the film off. I didn't expect them to work to be honest, so the fact that I got some fun (if a bit silly) results always makes me smile. Sometimes I take things way to seriously so these were a nice reminder to enjoy myself, to stop comparing myself to other people and to enjoy the process, even if I am waving a camera around in front of a christmas tree haha.

Camera: Holga 135bc
Film: Lomo CN 80

Out of my comfort zone...

I wasn't originally going to share these photos as overall, I'm really disappointed in them, the colours are dull and most of the results are a little blurry (wrong camera and film choice I think. Bother). However I mentioned before about 'keeping it real' and sometimes I think that the process of working towards a great photo is just as important as getting that great photo and these photos are definitely part of the process.

I took all these photos in an attempt to populate my photos, to document the people around me as well as the landscape. This is a challenge for me and something I struggle with when I go somewhere new. I studied Interior Design at university so I am automatically drawn to architecture and perspective photos, so training myself to look for interesting human moments is really quite difficult when I'm constantly distracted by interesting designs, shapes and lines.

{a moment alone and a pop of red}

{Ok, I was more interested in the dogs, but look at the middle ones happy face... so cute}

{I so wish this one wasn't blurry... I was quite taken with these two ladies.}

{Ok, this last photo, I am actually happy with - I loved the idea of the seagulls being just like the couple on the bench, having a moment to look around, enjoy the view - perhaps they are even all looking at the same thing.}

I think its so easy to fall into habits with your chosen hobby, to know what you're good at and just stick with it but film (and toy camera) photography to me has always been about the challenge, and I'm hoping that when I look back at these in the future, I'll see these photos as the beginning of a new, tougher challenge and hopefully I'll be able to see some progression too (fingers crossed).

I'd love to hear about how you push yourself in the comments - either with photography or elsewhere, sometimes even a small push is all we need to improve, so lets encourage each other!

Camera: Holga 135bc
Film: Lomography ISO 400 (usually a winning combo but not this time)
Location: Whitby, England.

p.s. if anyone tells me how great these photos are, I won't believe you lol, I'm just saying!