Start with why

I've been reading a book called 'Start with Why'  by Simon Sinek. I'm only about 60 pages in, but already, its inspired me and made me focus on why I do things.

Why I blog is something I think about a lot. Its hard not to, I read other peoples thoughts on it fairly often, I read blogs where bloggers blog for money or as their living and blogs where they blog their interests very specifically. I guess my blog has become one of those, but I've struggled recently with the boundaries of being a photography blog, mainly because I haven't really felt like taking photos. Definitely a problem if people come here expecting photos.

So why do I blog? I thought about this a lot during my time away from here.

Well first, I love to type. It sounds a bizarre first reason, but its definitely my favourite way to record my thoughts - I started a written journal recently, and although I have enjoyed it, I haven't enjoyed it as much as typing my blog. Its faster I guess, it uses both arms, it feels more involved, I can think and type at the same speed... there are lots of reasons, but really, I just like typing my thoughts.

Second, I love sharing my thoughts and stories. I can be quite restricted in what I'm willing to share, but I like pulling my words together to tell a story to you, and I like beefing it up with photos. Sometimes the photos tell the story but lately, I've been more courageous with my words. Its easy to hide behind photos - you let the viewer make the connections and form their own reactions - but words are where the specificity is and ultimately my soul may be in my photos but my voice is in my words.

Third, I like making connections. With people, with blogs, with skills, with hobbies. I like connecting to others, sharing ideas, reading about peoples lives and blogging lets me do that easily. Thomas is often surprised by how much information I can tell him about the people who leave comments - the same with the blog friends I've met in real life. I like getting to know people and sharing in their life's, you might be surprised by how much I remember about the connections that I've made too :)

Fourth, I want to inspire people. To make people smile, to improve someone's day and its nice to think that my photos or words could do that for someone. I want my connections to flow both ways. 

I've been blogging for nearly 5 years now, and its only really recently that I've truly appreciated that I do blog for me without trying - for my peace of mind, for organising my thoughts - I don't really do it just to share photos. When I've been struggling, I've tried to pull my thoughts together into blog posts in my head to find solutions, ways I could share my thoughts and make them worthwhile. I like the structure of writing things out and forming a conclusion.

The worst part of blogging, for me, is the expectations I think - guessing them, getting them right, getting them wrong... you can never tell what will be popular with readers, why they are really here. And that inconsistently used to upset me. Especially when I had more readers yet didn't seem to get the page views or comments. I never really knew why my blog got so popular in terms of followers at one stage, I didn't do anything specific, in fact I don't feel like my blog really changed much at all. Similarly, I don't know why all those people disappeared either. Numbers are weird and you can't really rely on them. Unless you rely on them being inconsistent haha.

The numbers don't really matter to me now. I don't benefit from them financially or emotionally. Like I said before, I'd rather focus on the connections, on the real people, the comments, the interactions. 

Blogging for me has become a ritual, something I do most week days because I enjoy it rather than as a job and I want to keep it that way to be honest. I see people pushing their blogs forward and I'm happy for them - if that's what they want to do then they have my support - but what I've finally learnt is that if its not your own path - then don't take it and don't feel bad about it.

Blog for your why, not for someone elses. You have your own path, the hard part is recognising it as well as walking on it. Think about your why and focus on those when you make decisions, when you write posts - the why should be the only consistent thing and everything else - either expected or unexpected - will come from that. 

I'm intrigued now - whats are your whys for blogging? What really drives you to share, to tell stories, to connect with others? There are no wrong answers :)

On writing an e-course

I've mentioned a few times in passing that I've been trying to write a Toy Camera inspired e-course... I get a lot of questions about my cameras and I thought, well if people go out of their way to ask me about it, then maybe I can share what I've learnt through an e course and the more I thought about it, the more I loved the idea. However, it took me about 2 or 3 months to just write the structure of the course out. I'm not kidding. This is not an easy task.

My first mistake was in trying to write a course to teach people how to use their cameras. I've never had any photography lessons, or been taught anything to do with film or plastic cameras. Everything that I know, I've found out myself and learnt through (a lot) of trial and error. So in the end, I really struggled, as I wasn't 100% sure on all the actual facts to start with or whether people would want to learn from a self taught, mistake maker. (heh, I like that... self taught, mistake maker...)

It was only last week, after leaving the plan for a couple of weeks, that I realised exactly what it is that I want to share with people. I want to share my passion and love for toy camera and film photography. I want people to take part and want to pick up their camera and take photos. I want them to love their photos, enjoy taking them and share the results enthusiastically. I want to reach out to like minded people and talk to them about photos, really get to know them and their style, what makes them tick, what they're scared of, what they want to achieve. I want to share it all with them.

And in that moment, I realised that this course wasn't about the cameras at all, it was about my photography journey and what I've learnt so far and its about their journey and where they want to be. And I think, that in being a part of this course with other people, I'm actually going to learn as much as they will because no one's photography journey ever really ends, your goals change, your results change, you change... and your photography always reflects that.

Gosh, I'm so excited about it, I just need to actually write the actual content now, haha. (also I needed to get this out too before I start... any encouragement/kicks up the butt would be most appreciated)

p.s. I am absolutely terrified that no one is actually going to want to do this course, but I'm writing it anyway. Score one for bravery.

p.p.s. I'm also attempting to share more on here, score two!